Since
I started practicing yoga, my perspective has changed in so many ways.
One thing I have noticed, is how every time I bring a friend that is a
"first time yogi" to class, they tell me how much they loved it and how
great they feel. But the conversation always ends with "I just can't wait until I get better at it."
To
be fair, that is just human nature. We all have this little part of
ourselves that is always competing, always trying to be better, always
striving for perfection. Some of us feel this more than others, but we
all have a small desire for that feeling of being the best. The society
we live in makes this harder to subside, we are surrounded by ads of
picture perfect people, the next "upgrade" in all of our electronics,
#transformationtuesdays, and pictures of beautiful people perfecting the
headstand. When I first started doing yoga I felt the same way. I could
barely touch my toes, I was about 30 pounds overweight and I was (and
still am) extremely uncoordinated. I wanted to be one of those toned up
yogis, with a great figure and an awesome handstand. I felt somewhat
awkward and uncomfortable when I first started out (because I had no
idea what I was doing), but how I felt afterward is what always brought
me back. I said to myself that I couldn't wait until I got better, I
couldn't wait until I could do all the "cool" poses.
Somewhere
along my yoga journey, something clicked in me that being able to do
the "cool" poses wasn't what mattered. It wasn't all about doing those
picture perfect headstands, to be as flexible as a rubber band or to be
the most toned person in the room. What really mattered, was how yoga
made me feel. Did I get better at certain poses? Yes. Can I do poses now
that I couldn't do before? You betcha. Did yoga make me a stronger,
more flexible, and physically healthier person? Of course. But what I
found mattered the most was what yoga did for my mind. I learned that
even if I couldn't balance in tree pose, if I couldn't hold myself in
crow, if I had trouble getting into half a pigeon or I opted for child's
pose instead of wheel, all of that didn't matter. Because when I left
that practice I still had a heart filled with gratitude, love radiating
through my skin and a light weight feeling on my body that nothing else
could bring. I still felt as though I was centered and grounded, but
free and flying all at the same time.
I
had a teacher once tell me, "yoga is all about the journey, not the
destination." As cliche as that may sound, it is so. entirely. true.
Through the practice of yoga, we learn to appreciate what our bodies can do for us now and not worry about what we wish they could
do. We learn that our bodies are not machines, that we don't have a
"latest upgrade" button like all of our cellphones and laptops, so we
must learn to be patient and kind to ourselves. We learn to live in the
now rather than waiting for the future. We learn that we aren't perfect
and that is beautiful.
Yoga
isn't about competing with the person to the left, the person to the
right, or even ourselves. What we learn through the journey of the
practice, is to love and accept ourselves for who we are, and appreciate
every single moment.
Namaste.
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